![\"Gratitude](\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/r9f.352.myftpupload.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/11\/Gratitude-closet.jpg?resize=584%2C779\")
<\/p>\n<\/p>\n
I love my colleague Tina for many things, but especially because she drinks her coffee from a mug that announces, \u201cI Don\u2019t Do Perky.\u201d False Positive<\/em> is the title of an article I wrote for psychotherapists about the downside of positive thinking. And a humorous essay<\/a> of mine begins, \u201cThis gratitude craze bugs the shit out of me.\u201d<\/p>\n So it may come as a surprise that I\u2019ve recently begun keeping a gratitude journal.<\/p>\n Call me a hypocrite. I prefer to think of it as similar to the time I went from being a person who doesn\u2019t much like dogs to owning one. I could really relate to canine-indifferent friends who couldn\u2019t express an enthusiasm they did not feel for such lovable behaviors as tail-wagging and that (not so, to them) endearing doggy lean-in.<\/p>\n Likewise, I understand why someone who is suffering can feel even worse when asked to embrace positive emotions. It\u2019s not that I\u2019m a depressive ingrate by nature (at least not most of the time). But I\u2019m wary of efforts to sanitize thought and speech. Too often, expressions of negativity are met with rebuke instead of empathy, and I\u2019ve seen the damage this causes, personally and professionally.\u00a0 I thus try to champion all those nasty feelings we feel pressure to squelch: anger, sorrow, bitterness, envy, vengeance. Superimposed gratitude is like a thin coat of whitewash that seals in the toxins.<\/p>\n And yet, stubborn resistance is equally problematic.<\/p>\n So during a hard time this summer, I relinquished my protestations and started a gratitude journal, figuring that it couldn\u2019t hurt.<\/p>\n It\u2019s nothing fancy, just an old 5×7\u201d Reporter\u2019s Notebook covered with my daughter\u2019s grade-school scribbles . Every night I write the date and \u201cI am grateful for\/that . . . \u201c Then I list 3-5 things. I try not to repeat myself (though our latest addiction, the TV series Nashville<\/a>, has made it into several days, and there\u2019s a sprinkling of entries that say \u201cRAIN! RAIN! RAIN!\u201d).<\/p>\n Here are some of the things I\u2019ve jotted down recently:<\/p>\n (And although this isn\u2019t a current event, I\u2019m grateful to my daughters, whose persistent dog lobbying brought Button into our lives for 15 years.)<\/p>\n Two weeks into my gratitude journal, one of the things I wrote was \u201cFeeling way less depressed.\u201d Though the ritual of giving thanks surely helped, there were other things at play as well: I\u2019d resumed weekly therapy after cutting back; the post-cancer scans that always make me nervous were clear; I finally followed through on my intention to volunteer; my weight finally started heading in the right direction; things started to go better for the Democrats; the summer drought of movies yielded to a fresh crop of Oscar worthies; our actual drought yielded (a little) to rain and the promise of more to come.<\/p>\n There is always more to come. \u00a0Assuming El Nino delivers on its promise, I look forward to jotting down my gratitude for SUN! SUN! SUN!<\/p>\n That\u2019s how it goes, the chiaroscuro of darkness and light that makes up life\u2019s full spectrum.<\/p>\n I\u2019m grateful for it all.<\/p>\n *<\/p>\n Ever felt (or promoted) the prohibition on negative feelings? How\u2019d it go? What are you grateful for? <\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" I love my colleague Tina for many things, but especially because she drinks her coffee from a mug that announces, \u201cI Don\u2019t Do Perky.\u201d False Positive is the title of an article I wrote for psychotherapists about the downside of … Continue reading \n
![\"Button\"](\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/r9f.352.myftpupload.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/Button.jpg?resize=150%2C112\")
<\/p>\n